 |
At 17:40:27 on 17.01.10, zoelovesanimals wrote: hi, ive lost all of my confidence when riding again and its really getting me down. my pony is the most ploddish pony around and is such a sweetheart it is actually unbelievable you can put anyone and anything on her and she doesnt bat an eyelid. but the last couple of months i have lost all my bottle. i tried to get on today my mum lifted me on i sat on she moved and i threw myself onto my mum.
|
 |
At 19:54:51 on 17.01.10, Laneyloo wrote: Hi zoelovesanimals,its not that uncommon,it would help if you had said what it was that made you so nervy when riding if you say it isnt the pony as she sounds a dream.I have always been pushed to get straight back up in the saddle but that isn,t always the way to go,i would say try just sitting in the saddle even just for a minute at a time and go from there,making sure the pony doesn,t move,maybe have a head collar on and have the pony still tied up loose so it can move a little but not far so can get the trust back in the pony and yourself.best to take it slowly and build yourself up at a rate your comfortable with.hope this helps.with every minute you sit the more confidence you gain.
|
|
At 19:57:27 on 17.01.10, zoelovesanimals wrote: well the main problem is because im in a wheelchair from a non riding accident 5years ago i have this fear that something is going to happen to me when i ride and i have a major fear of falling off or not going to be able to control a situation. it doesnt help i suffer from panic attacks as this just makes it worse. Polly is a dream and i love riding her when i am on her, its just getting on thats the problem. as soon as i have go on and started walking around i am fine. x
|
 |
At 20:25:29 on 17.01.10, Angelalain wrote: Zoe, we've all seen your vids, side saddle and astride, riding at the Nationals last year. We all KNOW you can do it! And you know it too! Its only that you've had to miss so many weeks with the weather. The trouble is you start to think you can't, and you are not alone. When I eventually get back on Foxy i will be like a jelly! I know what she can do, and I doubt my ability to deal with it, I've been through it before. What generally happens is, she does something bad, I stay on and cope and suddenly realise I can do it. You know Polly is good, she isn't going to do anything bad, you've just got to get past it! Try the visualisation method. Imagine yourself riding round the field, round the arena as you did last year. Remember what it felt like, it felt good, you were fine, play t over and over, and do it right before you get on. Then get on and ride round the arena just like you did last summer. chose a nice day, with the sun shining, if necessary get someone to ride her round first, have them all there to help! Next week I expect to see pics of you back on board. You can do it, we Know you can!
|
|
At 20:27:11 on 17.01.10, Angelalain wrote: Have you read the rest of the threads on here? I was really impressed with some of the suggestions and comments. If you haven't read them, do!!!
|
 |
At 20:42:33 on 17.01.10, Em28 wrote: Hey Zoe really hope you are feeling a little more confident soon. Don't beat yourself up and give yourself time. I would completely agree with Angelalain. Because you have not rode for a while you have just been able to imagine riding, your mind has probably gone into overdrive thinking about it with mixed emotions and excitement, somewhere your mind has allowed negative thoughts to come in and anxiety build up. I know my mind can be my own worst enemy, as well as my best friend at times! Visualisation can be a great key in helping with confidence. Also mantras, each morning tell yourself out loud you are a good and confident rider say it with conviction. Visualise all the wonderful achievements you have had whilst riding Polly and Shannon. You can do it Zoex
|
 |
At 14:58:18 on 18.01.10, CarolineP wrote: Hi Zoe, as usual, plenty of helpful comments from group members here. And yes, do have a look at other posts, especially the "What Bugs You" thread, because there are lots and lots of tips there. I would say, practise Calming Breathing. Breathe slowly and rhythmically in through your nose and out through your mouth, taking twice as long to breathe out as you did to breathe in. If you're not familiar with this sort of breathing, you'll need to practise it until it becomes easy, which won't take long. This will be a major help in defusing your panic attacks. Start doing this type of breathing the second you begin to feel uncomfortable. The Bach Flower remedies Star of Bethlehem and Rock Rose will also help you. I can make you up a prescription based on your problem emotions if you'd like to contact me through my website. As other people have said, visualisation will also help you, as you have lots of positive experiences to revisit. Spend 10 or 15 minutes every day mentally rehearsing what you want to do. If any negativity creeps into your mind, just delete it and replace with something better. When you feel comfortable with your visualisation, you can start to bring in scenarios where things don't quite go according to plan and practise how you'd handle that situation. The more you practise mentally, the more and more part of you that way of thinking, feeling and behaving becomes. Habits are formed by repetition. Remember, too, to eat the elephant - in other words, take this in bite-sized pieces. That makes it manageable and easier to deal with. Hope this helps, Zoe. Let me know how you get on, Kind regards, Caroline http://www.enjoyriding.com
|
 |
At 23:50:23 on 18.01.10, BlkHrsRdr wrote: First let me openly thank Caroline for starting this and offering so much sound advice on this topic. Zoelovesanimals, everyone has offered lots of great tips to help rebuild your confidence. Course we all know it's easy to say, not so easy to DO. ;) Not sure if something that has been working for me will help you too, but thought I would toss it your way. After being hurt from a couple nasty unplanned (ok one planned as an emergency) dismounts, ungraceful too I may add I lost my confidence, and I would experience sheer terror as soon as my mare took one step. Part was my lack of balance, that alone will make you feel helpless and out of control as I am sure you are aware. But beyond that I had to find a way to help myself move past the terror because my body would involuntarily freeze when I was afraid. The difference came when a friend asked why I didn't trust my horse. Odd question, I thought, right? I think this may be a journey you should take also, because you seem to believe your pony is a good pony, so why don't you trust her? I thought about this and could not come up with a valid reason to not trust my horse. She hadn't ever done anything to cause me harm. I then made a conscious decision to change how I viewed and thought about my horse and my riding. Granted it was NOT easy in the beginning, but I decided to trust my mare to take good care of me - AND I chose to view everything she did that maybe frightened me as her way of attempting to do that, to take care of me. Getting on, or trying to, if she would not stand still for me, for instance. Instead of thinking, "oh boy she is already all excited and not calm... she is a powder keg ready to blow up..." and that'd make me even more afraid, I consciously told myself that she was trying to tell me I was not ready to be on her. Sounds simple? Well it wasn't really that easy, but I kept telling myself that was the truth, she was trying to tell me that I shouldn't get on, because I wasn't ready. Well that was true because I was terrified. The first time I did this something changed in my horse. :) Something changed in me as well. I was still completely frightened, don't get me wrong, but I know she looked at me differently even though I was still very much afraid. I would end up looking her in the eye and saying something like, "Yes I am afraid, and I appreciate that you are pointing that out, but WE have to do this so I can learn to be ok on you again. Please trust me as I will trust you and help me not be so afraid." Every time I would do this she would then walk up and stand like a rock until I asked her to move off. I learned to verbalize it and share with her, I learned to trust a little more each time. No it wasn't easy to just blindly trust her at first, but I gave it my best shot every time I got on. If she spooked and I lost my balance I took a few long deep breaths (as Caroline suggest) and thanked her for protecting me from the scary thing. And for my safety sake I only rode when someone was there to help control her. It worked in more ways than you would think. How you think about things shapes your world, this is so true. I chose to think about my fear and my horse differently, I chose to trust in her to be good at all times and always take good care of me. I chose to look at the 'bad' things she would do as her way to protect me. It didn't happen overnight, but it did happen. One day I got on her and asked her to trot and I instinctively tensed, bracing for what "may come" expecting her to do her usual of fast rushing off, throwing me off balance. Instead she refused to trot, she just kept walking at the same pace! That was a breakthrough, one I began to cry over. :) She was truly protecting me from myself. Instead of her usual 'ok, I'll trot because you asked but you aren't ready for it' and her rushing due to my tension she chose to not trot. Finally she really was taking care of me again. I did some deep breathing, relaxing as much as I was able, forced my hands well forward in a show of complete trust and asked her to trot again. She trotted off calmly, a nice easy paced trot, as soon as I lost my balance she slowed and stopped, being very careful to stay well underneath me in the process. Even today if I ask her to trot or canter and I am too tense she won't; if she trots or canters and I instantly lose my balance on two attempts she will not trot for me again that day no matter how I ask for it! But if my balance is good, she will continue to do as I ask and trot off or canter without issue. She really does take good care of me, and now of course I fully and completely trust her to do just that. And that for me is what has made the difference, it was how I looked at it, how I thought about it. And yes it takes a bit of time, but was much faster progress moving past my fears once I made this decision and put it into practice. My trainer has always said that riding is 90% mental, 10% skill. He is SO right. Best of luck!!!
|
 |
At 11:47:58 on 31.01.10, connie wrote: I am a confident novice with a beautiful horse, but she can be strong, and I am petrified to canter her in case she does not stop, I have been walking and trotting for years now, but cannot seem to take this step, any advice?
|
 |
At 13:04:25 on 31.01.10, barbmulelover wrote: We have a friend who was in a car crash 5 years ago and he is paralyzed from the waist down. He runs barrels and poles with our club and actually was 1st in 3D this past year!! He says it not the riding that hurts it's the ground!! Here is a picture of John running his mare Coco.
|
